Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie Roommate Fight Erupts Over Brad Pitt in San Francisco (Part I)

May 20th, 2010 by Autumnn Darden| Posted in Apartment Life 2.0, Roommate Court | 3 Comments »

That is by far the most search friendly title to a blog post I have ever written. It is also a treacherous fabrication of the truth, but what a great way to introduce another gripping serial installment to the MyNewPlace Blog — Roommate Court with Judge Reinhold!

Of course they are fighting now, look at how hot that moustache is.

So the idea for Roommate Court started when we received an email from a distressed renter whose roommates are amidst a bitter feud; apparently one roommate stole the man she knew her other roommate was interested in and now her apartment is about as fun to live in as a Creed concert. Who is to blame for the feud and how should it be resolved? You, the readership, are the jury, so deliberate in the comments section.

Here’s the email: (For the sake of anonymity we’ll be using pseudonyms that generate a lot of search volume on Google.)

My roommates Ms. Aniston and Ms. Jolie were good friends and roommates. They told jokes, made each other dinner and [would have scantily clad pillow fights almost every night]. But this all changed about a month ago, when Angelina started dating Brad Pitt even though she knew that Jennifer liked him. Now, the apartment is very tense, especially when Angelina brings Brad over. Should I tell Jennifer to get over it or should I tell Angelina to get on board with universal sisterhood and forego her lustful urges?

-Distressed in San Francisco

So here’s how we’ll do this, first, we’ll lay out the charges, hear the facts of the case and hear statements from our plaintiff and defendant.

The plaintiff, Ms. Anniston alleges that Ms. Jolie breached a roommate code of conduct when she successfully wooed local hotsuff Brad Pitt despite the fact that Ms. Jolie knew of Ms. Aniston’s attraction. The plaintiff thereby established a total embargo on Ms. Jolie, refusing all goods, services and halting all diplomatic relations. The apartment living situation is now “like the freaking DMZ.”

Thus, the there are two questions on which we must pass judgment: 1) has Ms. Jolie indeed breached a code of roommate conduct with her man-stealin’ and 2) is Ms. Anniston’s embargo justified?

We’ll be back later today with Ms. Aniston and Ms. Jolie’s opening statements.